April is National Poetry Month!
Posted by Terrible on April 19, 2009 – 3:12 pm
Song of the Enchantress (A Road Called Life)
I travel a road both long and slow
Where it ends no one shall know
Through lands of peace and lands of love
And to guide me a snow white dove
Through times of war and times of pain
Let the loss not outweigh the gain
Trees above and Earth below
In my mind a dream does grow
Of an Enchantress fair and sweet
In the future I shall meet
Or was the past now long gone
That she sang her enchanting song
Of a road that is long and slow
Down which we all must go
For each of us a road alone
Which meander and meet when prone
A road of peace, a road of fear
On which love is ever near
Take note of each milepost my friend
For we know not which shall mark the end
Theodore Blodgett
1983
April 19th, 2009 at 10:58 pm
There was a young lady from Ealing
Who protested she la…
(awkward silence)
I’ll get me coat
April 20th, 2009 at 12:54 am
no no no Mentis. National Limrick Month is March. :-)
Cute vid!
April 20th, 2009 at 12:55 am
You are a bad, bad man, Mentis.
But you gotta finish the limerick, as I actually don’t know that one.
Didja hear the one about the girl from Jahoor?
And Terrible, that’s a lovely poem. I don’t have any like that. Mine usually skeer the living shit out of other people.
April 20th, 2009 at 1:25 am
It’s not worth it, Annti. Rhyming “Boris” with “clitoris”? I ask you!
April 20th, 2009 at 2:40 am
Well, shit, what in the hell DOES rhyme with “clitoris,” aside from “Lavoris” mouthwash?!?!
Wait… I think that I hear inspiration knocking… we shall see, indeed… we shall see…
And have you or have you not heard the one about girl from Jahoor?
(hey, YOU started it…)
April 20th, 2009 at 2:43 am
I had great dreams of being a poet for about three seconds as a pre-teen. Of course, I was also going to be an FBI agent like Clarice Starling. And a mad chemist.
Ah, the dreams of childhood.
I barely know where to begin writing a letter, so I’d be completely lost when trying to put a poem together. It makes me admire those who can do it that much more. Thank you for sharing this with us, Terrible. I really enjoyed reading it.
April 20th, 2009 at 2:46 am
Didja hear the one about the girl from Jahoor?I haven’t, but I have heard about a vampire named Mabel.
April 20th, 2009 at 2:47 am
Fucking Blogger! What happened to my spaces?
April 20th, 2009 at 3:27 am
And have you or have you not heard the one about girl from Jahoor?Is she the one with the uncanny wriggle, or the one with the sores?
April 20th, 2009 at 3:28 am
Blogger comments are being double-plus-stupid today.
April 20th, 2009 at 4:59 am
Today, yesterday, day before… it wasn’t all my fault! And no, I haven’t been dicking-around with the format/template, either.
The one with the wriggling hips, though I’m afeared to hear about the one with the sores…
I believe that you’ve shared that pithy story of the Vampire Named Mabel, but I don’t remember how it goes… care to share again?
Yes, I’m asking for dirty limericks. Sue me. I have no actual properly-constructed “poetry” to display, at least none that won’t make anybody open a vein…
April 20th, 2009 at 1:07 pm
I may have to look and see if I still have my book of limricks. Way way back when I was in the army there was a guy I served with who played rugby and him and his wife had lots and lots of limricks they always shared with us. But the best one they had wasn’t a limrick but a song about a woodpecker hole. I can’t remember it all now but it went something like:
Stuck my finger in a woodpecker hole
and the woodpecker said reciprocate, reciprocate.
So I reciprocated and the woodpecker said rotate, rotate
so I rotated and the woodpecker said…..
If anyone knows this song PLEASE post the whole thing!
April 20th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
Ya gotta love google!
THE WOODPECKER
(Tune: Dixie)
Oh I stuck my finger in a Woodpecker’s hole
And the Woodpecker said well bless my soul
Take it out, take it out, take it out, remove it.
So I removed my finger from the Woodpecker’s hole
And the Woodpecker said well bless my soul
Put it back, put it back, put it back, replace it.
So I replaced my finger in the Woodpecker’s hole
And the Woodpecker said well bless my soul
Turn it around, turn it around, turn it around, revolve it.
So I revolved my finger in a Woodpeckers hole
And the Woodpecker said well bless my soul
In and out, in and out, in and out, reciprocate it.
So I reciprocated my finger in the Woodpeckers hole
And the Woodpecker said well bless my soul
Pull it out, pull it out, pull it out, retract it.
So I retracted my finger from the Woodpecker’s hole
And the Woodpecker said well bless my soul
Take a smell, take a smell, take a smell, revolting.
April 20th, 2009 at 10:29 pm
That’s… um… special?
Didn’t know that woodpeckers ever shared their holes, but okayyy…
To get a little grosser:
There once was a girl from Jahoor
who’d lie on a rug on the floor
She’d wiggle her hips
and lick her sweet lips
And drain yer balls
dry to the core!
Not flattering, I know, but still kinda funny. I think that I got over the Nantucket line back when I was reading those “World’s Worst Jokes” books back in high school… Blanche Knott, et al…
NEXT!
April 21st, 2009 at 2:49 am
There once was a vampire named Mabel
Whose periods came quite stable
So on the full moon
She’d take out a spoon
And drink herself under the table
How’s THAT for flattering? ;)
April 21st, 2009 at 4:07 am
THAT’S the one! I knew that you’d told me, but you know how my short-term memory is like a sieve sometimes… I’m glad that you posted it!
Heh.
April 21st, 2009 at 2:27 pm
Yeah the woodpecker thing was funnier hearing that couple sing it. Maybe it was the German beer or the applecorn.
April 21st, 2009 at 7:21 pm
Applecorn?