Mark Of The Beast

Y’ever get a piece of news that just makes your heart float up out of your chest?

Okay, here’s the Cliff’s Notes: The Dick, The Fallen Uterus, and their eldest spawn, The Queen Of The Camel-Toe journeyed up to a small town in Mississippi today, to inspect the old family (paternal side on the paternal side) cemetary today, in pursuit of the Camel-Toe’s genealogy hobby. While there, they visit with the little old man who owns the property, and turns out that he knew The Dick’s paternal grandfather.

See, it’s been long-held in the family mythology that there’s a lot of Cherokee and possibly Choctaw blood in the lines, which is readily apparent when you look at The Dick, his (late) father, uncles, etc. BUT — turns out that The Dick’s grandfather, who died when he was a kid, was “DARK”. Not Indian dark, either.

So, NOW we know where the “nappy” hair comes from, eh?

Forgive me if I’m the only one rolling on the floor over this, but you have to remember that The Dick’s entire raison d’etre has been, basically, “Well, at least I’m not a N****R!!!”

This is the guy who called me (for the FIRST time, anyway), when I was around 6 or 7, a “n****r-lover” for WATCHING “THE JEFFERSONS” ON TV!!!!!!
This is a guy who has repeatedly “disowned” his granddaughters for dating black guys.
This is a guy who’s been overcompensating his entire fucking life.

And I think that it’s absofuckinglutely hysterical.

Small wonder that I’ve always felt more comfortable around black people than around the cracker redneck motherfuckers in this state. Heh.

And the funniest part is, it’s on BOTH sides of his family!!!!!! Oh, he always tried to pass that “one” black cousin off as a “Redbone Indian” (that’s Mississippi for a mixture of black, white, and Native American) or as “just Indian” — but as it turns out, yeaaaahhhhhh, NOT SO MUCH.

Small wonder that his mommy didn’t want anybody doing any genealogical research, eh? Gee, I WONDER what she coulda been hiding when she “lost” that family bible??!?!

BWUAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAAHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!

I wish that I knew where in the hell that my friend Tanisha Toussaint was, ’cause she’d be rollin’ on the floor with me over this…

To reiterate, as I’ve always said: If you’re kin to ANYBODY in Mississippi, you’re kin to ALLLLL of Mississippi!!!
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(Excepting Haley Bush-Blowing Barbour and that jobless parasitic piece of bigoted shit, Donald “AFA” Flamer Hypocrite Freak Wildmon — I know for DAMNED SURE that I ain’t kin to either ONE of those motherfuckers!!!!!!)

At any rate, karma does work sometimes… Even if it takes sixty-five fuckin’ years to do it… heh heh heh…