Nine down, ??? to go…
Posted by Anntichrist S Coulter on July 30, 2007 – 5:22 pm
SUNDAY:
Caught 7 feral cats (teenagers and one baby kitten) in Slaughter, LA today, and one of the marmalades (a sweet little orange & white tabby girl) has TWENTY-THREE FUCKING TOES!!!!!!!!!!!!
I SHIT Y’ALL NOT.
And the sweet, docile, adorable baby black kitten?
TWENTY FUCKING TOES.
Not dew claws. THUMBS. And the orange one’s THUMBS have THUMBS COMING OFF OF THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Somebody’s dumping toxic waste over there, or the aliens have really landed.
And I’ve gotta be up and moving in 7 hours. Wheeee!!!
(And the only two COMPLETELY NORMAL ONES?!??!? One’s just a little nervous, the calico girl, but her SISTER is the DEMON-SPAWN, GROWLING, LUNGING, ATTACKING, GNAWING, BITING, TRYING-TO-KILL-ME PSYCHO-PUSSY HELL-CAT FROM DICK CHENEY’S COLON!!!!!!!!!!! Seventeen bites in one fucking day, and like an idiot, I left the good leather gloves at home.)
Anyway, look at these pictures (I’m too fucking tired & exhausted & sun-stroked to blog it right now, and I haven’t been able to edit/manipulate/improve these pictures worth a shit, though humongous thanks to Realist and Kathy From Sparks for EVERYTHING!!!) and see if you can see the SEVEN TOES ON ONE FRONT PAW, SIX ON THE OTHER, AND THE DEW CLAWS ON THE BACK FEET of that sweet little marmalade girl.
MONDAY: Went BACK another hundred fucking miles WAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY to pick up two more — an androgynous tabby whose gender I could not determine (at least 1 year old) and a 10-12-week-old tuxedo boy WITH THUMBS, DEW CLAWS ON THE BACK FEET, AND I COULDN’T EVEN *COUNT* ALL OF THE EXTRA TOES as I put him into the carrier with the baby girl. Wish that I could get the vet to take better pictures for me, but she can’t be bothered with us “charity cases” to take PICTURES OF MUTANT TOES. She DOES take digital facial pictures of every cat that she does for Cat Haven, but got PISSED OFF AT ME when I asked her if she could get shots of all of the mutant toes, ’cause this is my first time, out of FIFTY-NINE CATS IN 11 MONTHS, that I’ve ever seen mutants of this quality. She didn’t give a fuck.
MONDAY: Went BACK another hundred fucking miles WAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY to pick up two more — an androgynous tabby whose gender I could not determine (at least 1 year old) and a 10-12-week-old tuxedo boy WITH THUMBS, DEW CLAWS ON THE BACK FEET, AND I COULDN’T EVEN *COUNT* ALL OF THE EXTRA TOES as I put him into the carrier with the baby girl. Wish that I could get the vet to take better pictures for me, but she can’t be bothered with us “charity cases” to take PICTURES OF MUTANT TOES. She DOES take digital facial pictures of every cat that she does for Cat Haven, but got PISSED OFF AT ME when I asked her if she could get shots of all of the mutant toes, ’cause this is my first time, out of FIFTY-NINE CATS IN 11 MONTHS, that I’ve ever seen mutants of this quality. She didn’t give a fuck.
But, since she does this stuff for us below her costs, I can’t tell her how I’d like to tranq-dart her with an estrogen/valium cocktail to take that huge fucking I-married-money-so-I’m-somehow-better-than-YOU chip off of her arrogant shoulder. I’ll be SOOOOOO glad when MY vet gets back from her honeymoon!!!!!!!!
Postponed the appointment with the new spine guy until next month, because there was no way in hell that I was going to make it through south Baton Rouge traffic today — I can barely sit up, much less walk, after 7 captures yesterday, and additional 200 miles on my ass & sp
ine, so the second opinion will have to wait. Going to take a long, hot bath and attempt a nap. Somebody please put me to sleep so that I don’t have to be THE ONLY FUCKING PERSON IN TWO PARISHES WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THESE ANIMALS anymore.ALSO: Monday & Wednesday of last week: Got Winter into the Cat Haven
Adult Adoption Program (after the sweet, docile, tame housecat bit me three times from a claustrophobia fit from the cardboard temp carrier, he was a perfect angel riding home with Cat Have Cathy, with his head sticking out of the hole that he ripped in the $5 damned box) and got THE LAST BOY CAT AT THE MYRTLES FINALLY FIXED!!!!!!!!!!! WOOO HOOOOO!!!!!! Glenn, the manager at the Myrtles, is a dear heart and a good friend, but man, getting that grounds & kitchen crew (to whom those cats walk right up and hop into their laps, but they’re too smart/skittish for me to TRAP the little weasels) to help — ??? — yeah, FOUR MONTHS FOR SIX CATS.
No pictures, please! Spooky is having his spa day, dammit!!!
August 2nd, 2007 at 1:37 am
{{{{{Annti!}}}} You are the best.
Love that beautiful white kitty. What a doll.
August 5th, 2007 at 3:44 am
Yeah, except for when he bit me three times en route to the vet’s for his adoption-program physical and shots. I was trying to calm him down (he got severely claustrophobic with the temporary laminated-cardboard carrier), so I stuck a finger in an air-hole to try and pet him, and he started GNAWING ON MY FINGER. Fucker.
Then he ripped a hole out of the other end of the carrier and stuck his head out. He rode that way all the way to Cathy’s and to the lady who does the adult adoptions, and he was fine! As long as he could see, he was an absolute “doll,” Cathy said, but ME, I was just a chewy toy. Gee, thanks, Winter!